Sam, although I see where your thoughts come from here – you are NOT a dickface.
You’re an insightful and inspiring individual and I love your work.
Rock on.
I think that if you use “manly” as a defense or a prop, then you sound like a dick face. But I think manly self-empowerment is awesome no matter what you look like.
I say this as a trans guy who grew up calling himself manly because he was afraid people would think he was a girl and think he was sissy (even though people already thought he was a girl. it was a confusing time), and is now a dude who likes purple and sparkles unironically and now I can feel manly and awesome for myself and not as a defense. It feels backwards from what you’re saying. And I’m pre-T, cause that feels relavent here.
Yeh, I think the pre-T, post-T bit is what I am thinking most about. That if people see me as a cis-guy/straight-forward guy-type person, then me saying I’m ‘Manly’ carries with it the yuck weight of privilege from patriarchy… and I am super proud of being a dude who is not quite that straight-forward, and is aware that women get a poop deal in a lot of ways because of sexism from patriarchy – so I get all caught up in my head about that stuff at the moment as I’m seen more widely by strangers and wider society as a man.
I don’t know if it’s me internalising it as a bad thing – because I don’t want to be mistaken for claiming that manliness is better than womanliness, for example – or, if it’s a wider-society thing, or if it’s just me being crazy.
Sam, although I see where your thoughts come from here – you are NOT a dickface.
You’re an insightful and inspiring individual and I love your work.
Rock on.
Yay! Thanks you
I think that if you use “manly” as a defense or a prop, then you sound like a dick face. But I think manly self-empowerment is awesome no matter what you look like.
I say this as a trans guy who grew up calling himself manly because he was afraid people would think he was a girl and think he was sissy (even though people already thought he was a girl. it was a confusing time), and is now a dude who likes purple and sparkles unironically and now I can feel manly and awesome for myself and not as a defense. It feels backwards from what you’re saying. And I’m pre-T, cause that feels relavent here.
Yeh, I think the pre-T, post-T bit is what I am thinking most about. That if people see me as a cis-guy/straight-forward guy-type person, then me saying I’m ‘Manly’ carries with it the yuck weight of privilege from patriarchy… and I am super proud of being a dude who is not quite that straight-forward, and is aware that women get a poop deal in a lot of ways because of sexism from patriarchy – so I get all caught up in my head about that stuff at the moment as I’m seen more widely by strangers and wider society as a man.
Perhaps it testifies to how messed-up society is that asserting your manliness as an actual man is considered A Bad Thing.
I don’t know if it’s me internalising it as a bad thing – because I don’t want to be mistaken for claiming that manliness is better than womanliness, for example – or, if it’s a wider-society thing, or if it’s just me being crazy.
Superheros don’t come to the call of dick faces, therefore you are not a dick face.
I like your reasoning 🙂